I have an overwhelming sense of hope today. I don't know why, nothing has changed. I've been having a hard time with my anxiety attacks while switching medicines. I've had dear friends write very encouraging words and Bible verses. I've started a new personal study on Joy. In this study I came across Psalm 27: 13-14 "I am still confident of this: I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord."
I found that particular verse when M first came to us. His life and that of his siblings was so very ugly, scarred, and scary. I found much comfort in that verse. There was so much good that has come out of that ugly home. One of the best, of course, is that M is here with us and will have an open adoption with his family. Any day now. And that there where I am finding strength in that verse once again. I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord. I'm certain that on this side of heaven, I won't know why it's taken so long, or why the long wait once things seemed so ready to happen. There is a reason and I will take heart and wait on the Lord. For when M joins our family and I can shout it from the rooftops, it will be in the perfect timing of God!
All that, I believe. However, if you wish to pray with me that a few sheets of paper make their way to our lawyer so we can sign, that would be great. Prayer can't hurt after all. :)
As for my Carlee. We have good news waiting around the corner, or more precisely on Thursday. Her nuero doctors are hopeful to get her into a study to help her condition. I am being firm in the fact that she needs to be ours soon, so we'll have control over her medical care instead of having to go through social services and medicaid. We have such hope for our girl.
I've decided to stop stressing so much about our school work, it gets done. I still have a public school mentality even after 6 years of homeschooling, I feel like a failure if we haven't finished every subject that day. Well, here's to a new way. As I type Shane is doing his reading, on his own, after a long struggle. Jackson has started his first batch of multiplication and seems to have taken to it well. And Sam, is starting a whole new unit of stuff. It will delightful. :)
2 comments:
I got an email this morning about hope. I just started my friend Elora's Story-Sessions ecourse and it was her - about bottling up the hope we feel at the beginning of this journey together. Seriously, not 15 minutes later, you posted this. I shared your post, a little bit of your story, and this in my Story-Sessions group:
"I've had this overwhelming sense in the past week that my purpose has nothing to do with how much money I make or how many Twitter followers I obtain, but rather, how much I plunge into this crazy idea that I - that we - can make the world a better place with our words. Yes. In that, I'll place all my hope."
Let's bottle up this hope, my friend. I am so flipping honored to be your friend.
Oh I hear you on the homeschooling - I stress myself out so much over this one. We downsized our load this year and I'm thinking about cutting it even more next year. As long as they learn to read and read well and learn their math they can go on to learn anything they want to!!!
God bless you!
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