Well, I'm not running from 'The Others' or a Polar Bear or being swept around in time. However, I'm scared all the same. Terrified. Carleigh doesn't have Autism. She has brain damage cause by an issue with her birth. (for her privacy I cannot disclose the actual facts). Her brain injurt is irreparable. The damage is done. We have to work with what's left. Her new adjusted level in only 6-9 months. In terms of her adoption, we were told that she very well may need life long care. It's too early to tell.
So, I'm giving myself tonight. Tonight to mourn the life she won't have. Tonight to be scared out of my mind. Tonight to be terrified of the future.
Tomorrow. Tomorrow I will wake up and thank God for her. That she was brought into our home. That we're where she's supposed to be. Tomorrow, I start researching. Tomorrow, I make more calls. Tomorrow, for her, I fight!
5 comments:
My dear sweet kindred spirit , I DO truly know how this feels. Just like it was told to me, I will say to you that she was placed with you bc God knows the abilities you have for her. Because you are his hand chosen mother for her. There will still be times that you mourn her condition and the life she can't have. I do the same with my daughter. Strength will always come to you and I will always be here to talk to and pray for you. love ya.
You will fight for her. And she will be loved by many. And miracles happen every day..
What a wonderful place for her to be...with a family that loves her and will fight for her!
What wonderful words have already been spoken. Take your time to grieve. God will give you strength and grace one day at a time. So sorry.
((hugs))
Post a Comment